Lately I've become so saddened by the lack of faith I see. It seems it's increasing, or perhaps I just am becoming more aware of it, no matter how subtle it may seem. I hear people request prayer, express their desire for whatever it is, and then attach a "God's will be done" to it. Which, at first seems perfectly reasonable and so "spiritual". What bothers me about this is that more often than not, the spirit with which it's said is not one of surrender, but one of doubt.
I know because I've been guilty of this same doubt in my own life far too often. I have prayed about situations and added my own, "If it's Your will" to the prayer. More often than not, when I've added that, it had simply been a security blanket.
I was reading in Matthew this morning, and read this...
Matthew 8:1-3
1 When he came down from the mountain, great crowds followed him. 2 And behold, a leper came to him and knelt before him, saying, “Lord, if you will, you can make me clean.” 3 And Jesus stretched out his hand and touched him, saying, “I will; be clean.” And immediately his leprosy was cleansed.
Something about this struck me as sincere and true. This man was fully aware that Jesus COULD do it. He had the faith and confidence, he simply had the surrender as well. That's where our "if it's Your will" should come from...but it doesn't. We add it too often so that later, when He doesn't answer our prayer the way we want Him to, we can fall back on the fact we have included that, lest we become disillusioned with God.
I've heard so many people say that it's just because they've been disappointed by God so many times; they can't help but pray this way. (Which, at the risk of sounding judgmental, makes me wonder just how surrendered we are if this is the case...)
Oh that we as His children wouldn't approach prayer with the attitude of being afraid of being disappointed. For what's fear but lack of knowing who our God is?
Oh that we wouldn't pray expecting to be disappointed! As James says, "But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea that is driven and tossed by the wind. For that person must not suppose that he will receive anything from the Lord" (1:6-7).
And oh, that we wouldn't blame God for such disappointment, but instead ourselves!
