On my mind...

On My Mind - how much we acknowledge truths, but let it stop there. We remember and even esteem truths (and those who do let the truth affect their lives). But why do we so often (indeed, more often than not) back away from living truth out in our lives? Especially since part of the truth is that we are meant to live the truths....

.."we think grand thoughts and live horrible lives"..

we read His Word and think that because we've read it and perhaps acknowledged it in our minds, that we've got it. Then when push comes to shove, we want to put blame on God because things aren't as they should be. But really, it's us. Seeking and loving Him with all our hearts, soul, mind, strength does not stop with simple acknowledgement.

And why is it that so often, when we do let our acknowledgement go farther than our heads, we have a limit to it? Like there's some point where we can stop yielding to Him...there's some line where everything becomes too extreme to change anything for God.

Like His goal isn't to make us holy like Him...like the perfection and completion He wants to bring us to according to His Word is actually our happiness and comfort...



Oh Lord, get rid of this limit in me wherever there is one...I passionately hate this limit, line, whatever would be best to describe it. I hate it, loathe it, despise it...in everyone....especially in myself. Please, rip it out of me if You need to. I don't care how much it takes or how much it hurts. Get. Rid. Of. It.

My thoughts on To Save a Life

I recently watched this movie..and actually, I enjoyed it. Having known more than one person who committed suicide, the message it sent resonated with me.

I so appreciated that they didn't just stop with the "it's not your fault" speech most suicide survivors get from some well meaning person. I really appreciated and liked that it addressed that our words and actions can and do have a large impact on others' lives.

I enjoyed how powerful it was as a movie. It was dramatic. It was thought provoking. It was inspiring.

However, as probably many who know me would say, I can be very critical of movies. Especially movies that come with a Christian label. As much I enjoyed this movie and would recommend it, it doesn't escape my critical thoughts either.

This movie shows the main character (Jake) going through radical transformation after the suicide of his friend. At the beginning of the movie he cares mostly about sports, his reputation, and partying. He goes from being a guy who dreams of playing basketball to a guy who is willing to give up that dream for another one. He goes from being a popular guy to not caring if he's liked by everyone. He goes from being a guy who thinks of himself over his friends to one who puts his friends before himself. It's a radical transformation....but my fear is that those who watch it will walk away thinking how great the main character is. My fear is that people walk away from the movie saying, "we should be more like Jake".

This is my main complaint about this movie. It has a Christian label. It involves church and a youth pastor. It has a baptism. It has some prayer. It even shows a transformation of a life...But not once does this movie give credit to the true reason for that transformation. Watching the movie, I got the sense that out of guilt, Jake wanted to change how he interacted with people. He felt the guilt so strongly that it led to him feeling the need to redeem himself. I know because I've even there. I've tried that, and even in a fictional character in a movie, I recognized it.

Not once does Jake get told that he has a Redeemer and he is not Him. Not once does anyone tell him that he is a sinner and can do no good on his own. Not once does someone tell him that Christ died for his sins. Not once is he told that Jesus Christ is the One that forgives us, makes us new, and gives the grace that enables us to change and do His good work.

I've walked through the heartbreak of a loved one killing themselves. And like Jake, it was this experience that eventually led me to transformation. But not because I was disgusted and guilty about the way things were (which I was) and I changed them. But because He drew me to Him, He showed me the truth and power of His Gospel...because He transformed me.


It so saddens me that even a Christian movie eliminates that. It's not just this movie, but so much of the Christian entertainment industry, really. Books, movies, music, talks, etc. It seems that we try so hard to woo people to Christianity through sugar coated, feel good, therapeutic, politically correct entertainment. People don't need that kind of wooing. Truthfully, they don't need our wooing at all. They need the Gospel. They need Him.

Komen and Planned Parenthood

Pardon me, I'm feeling ranty...

So, I saw the article on The Komen Foundation cutting ties with Planned Parenthood, and since then, I've seen everyone's opinions on it as well. I'll admit, I'm not one-hundred percent behind the Komen Foundation. I support what they are trying to do, but I think it's become more of a market than anything, and to be honest, that part makes me ill. But I thanked God when I saw that they cut ties with Planned Parenthood...

And I honestly couldn't help but chuckle when I read comments complaining that the fund for cancer screening was taken away. Perhaps they'd have funds for cancer screening if they redistributed the money they use for abortion costs.

And then I saw on facebook a group called "De-Fund the Komen Foundation" and I was appalled. Their info section includes this : "How is it possible that an organization claiming to support saving women's lives also turns its back on an organization that is PROVEN to save women's lives?"

...Proven to save women's lives maybe....but how many others are they proven to TAKE?

Most of their funding might not be for abortion costs, but 1 out of every 10 clients receive an abortion...

and that's too many




It still amazes me that the same people (from a lot of what I see) who support equal rights for all in every area of life are the same ones to support taking the lives of so many precious little ones.

Edited to add - I would make another post ranting about the Komen Foundation's reverse decision, but I'll just say that it sickens me...

If You're willing

Lately I've become so saddened by the lack of faith I see. It seems it's increasing, or perhaps I just am becoming more aware of it, no matter how subtle it may seem. I hear people request prayer, express their desire for whatever it is, and then attach a "God's will be done" to it. Which, at first seems perfectly reasonable and so "spiritual". What bothers me about this is that more often than not, the spirit with which it's said is not one of surrender, but one of doubt.

I know because I've been guilty of this same doubt in my own life far too often. I have prayed about situations and added my own, "If it's Your will" to the prayer. More often than not, when I've added that, it had simply been a security blanket.

I was reading in Matthew this morning, and read this...

Matthew 8:1-3
¹ When he came down from the mountain, great crowds followed him. ² And behold, a leper came to him and knelt before him, saying, “Lord, if you will, you can make me clean.” ³ And Jesus stretched out his hand and touched him, saying, “I will; be clean.” And immediately his leprosy was cleansed.

Something about this struck me as sincere and true. This man was fully aware that Jesus COULD do it. He had the faith and confidence, he simply had the surrender as well. That's where our "if it's Your will" should come from...but it doesn't. We add it too often so that later, when He doesn't answer our prayer the way we want Him to, we can fall back on the fact we have included that, lest we become disillusioned with God.

I've heard so many people say that it's just because they've been disappointed by God so many times; they can't help but pray this way. (Which, at the risk of sounding judgmental, makes me wonder just how surrendered we are if this is the case...)

Oh that we as His children wouldn't approach prayer with the attitude of being afraid of being disappointed. For what's fear but lack of knowing who our God is?

Oh that we wouldn't pray expecting to be disappointed! As James says, "But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea that is driven and tossed by the wind. For that person must not suppose that he will receive anything from the Lord" (1:6-7).

And oh, that we wouldn't blame God for such disappointment, but instead ourselves!

Holiness

This morning, I cannot stop thinking, and inwardly weep, about the lack of reverence for our God. What tragedy that the church of Jesus Christ hardly recognizes this character of our God. Why..how... have we lost sight of the God who is Holy, Holy, Holy?

I remember hearing Eric read this bit from Jewish Literacy in the lesson, "Consecration" and it gripped me then and still does now. Ohh how I wish Christians would hold such an understanding and view of holiness..


God's world is great and holy. The holiest land in the world is the land of Israel. In the land of Israel the holiest city of Jerusalem. In Jerusalem the holiest place was the Temple, and in the Temple the holiest spot was the Holy of Holies...There are seventy peoples in the world. The holiest among these is the people of Israel. The holiest of the people of Israel is the tribe of Levi. In the tribe of Levi the holiest are the priests. Among the priests, the holiest was the High Priest...There are 354 days in the [lunar] year. Among these, the holidays are holy. Higher than these is the holiness of the Sabbath. Among Sabbaths, the holiest is the Day of Atonement, the Sabbath of Sabbaths...There are seventy languages in the world. The holiest is Hebrew. Holier than all else in this language is the holy Torah, and in the Torah the holiest part is the Ten Commandments. In the Ten Commandments the holiest of all words is the name of God...And once during the year, at a certain hour, these four supreme sanctities of the world were joined with one another. That was on the Day of Atonement, when the High Priest would enter the Holy of Holies and there utter the name of God. And because this hour was beyond measure holy and awesome, it was the time of utmost peril not only for the High Priest but for the whole of Israel. For if in this hour there had, God forbid, entered the mind of the High Priest a false or sinful thought, the entire world would have been destroyed.


Oh, Lord, give us the correct view of You. May we tremble in fear of Your complete and otherly Holiness... and yet still long to be intimately close to you.

Ohh, may we not take lightly verses like 1 Corinthians 6:19 - "Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own"

Saturday morning ponderings

I was reading and meditating on this verse this morning, and these are just some of the thoughts that ended up flowing out of that eventually.

Romans 16:17 - Now I beseech you, brethren, mark them which cause divisions and offences contrary to the doctrine which ye have learned; and avoid them.

It's verses like this that make me shake my head, for they put too many Christians to shame. I'm not entirely sure what "avoiding them" would look like yet, but Christians don't try to in any sense, it seems. We just take anything remotely under the label of Christian and think it's wonderful. We don't test it against the Scripture, and only then declare it's value.

This is what is sad: that cults and sects like the Jehovah's Witnesses have more diligence about this (and many other commands/rules/etc.) than we who have the real truth do. Some Christians keep away from such verses just to not look like them (not just Jehovah's Witnesses). But in doing so, we lose our God. For we must take all of Him or none at all. If we think we have Him and follow Him because we have pieces of Him (usually only the comfortable pieces)we fool ourselves.

It also is heartbreaking because as much as this world pokes at Christianity, they want to see it truly lived out. What Christianity are we displaying? When sects, cults, etc. show more devotion in following what they believe, it takes from our credibility. We don't, and seemingly can't, live what we teach. Those in sects and cults are not going to believe we have the truth, and those who don't believe at all have nothing to draw them in. This world is looking for and aching to see that the Bible is true and God Is. May we prove to this world the Bible is not just another book, but the Word of God!

Oh may we, His children, be rightfully diligent. May we count all things as loss compared to knowing Him. May we leave the past right where it is and pursue Him and the calling He has for our lives. (Phil 3 ;)) For out of that flows holiness and not just legalism. And true holiness is what this world is longing to see. And true holiness is what will make the difference for His glory.

In Our Weakness, He...

This weekend, God gave me lessons on grace. And how grateful am I for that! Friday, I woke up not feeling well at all. It just kept getting worse, to the point where a friend was going to walk me back to my dorm room. A staff member caught up with us, told me that she didn't want me in the dorms alone in case of an emergency, prayed for me, and let me sit in the back of the chapel. Suddenly, I was hearing a message on Right-handedness. And it begun with talking about the rights we feel we have. That was the first time God pricked my heart. I thought that because I didn't feel well, I had "the right" to check out. That everyone would understand if I just laid down across the chairs - that's all my body would let me do really. But God whispered, "My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect in your weakness".

It wasn't just encouragement or positive thinking as I had approached this verse in the past. It was God explaining to me what He was about to do. His grace is His Spirit working in and through me. He reminded me of this and I took a sigh of relief. I didn't have to do anything but surrender. He wanted me to sit up, pay attention, and take notes. And since I was too weak to do it, He lovingly did it for me. I went on the rest of the day, feeling ill, but letting His right-hand have control and uphold me. I never felt better, though I was feeling awful. Ha!

Saturday, though, was worse. I felt even more ill than on Friday. And I couldn't stop the tears from coming because it seemed I couldn't just surrender to His grace that day. All I could think about was how badly it hurt, how much I was shaking, and how my eyes couldn't focus on much of anything. The same staff member who cared for me on Friday came to me again and prayed with me. she encouraged me to turn outward. That there were other students who were ill as well.

Suddenly I realized the enemy had so much power over me when it comes to sickness. He probably gets so excited because he knows he can convince me to just look out for me. Thankfully, I realized this and refused this time. While I did lay down and rest, I surrendered to His grace rather than self-centeredness. I began to pray for my classmates who were sick. Within an hour (I think - I know it wasn't much more than that) I was feeling much better. Not shaky, I could see and my head wasn't throbbing nearly as much.

I went outside with my friend who graciously checked on me periodically. I was about to learn an incredibly valuable lesson - one which now seems like "Duh, Mary". She hadn't been feeling well that morning either, but God asked her to be focused outward on me instead. And there I was, praying for her. I also found out that she was feeling better as well!

Oh my, how His grace works! When everyone is turned outward, everyone is taken care of! Why we ever buy the enemy's lies that we need to take care of ourselves is baffling to me now!